She's on my mind .....Day 32 of 100 faces painted in 100 days.

Today is Day 32 closer yet to one third of the way through. As I go through the process of decision making I find that it is always a process of concluding the work. When is the right time to stop? So the joy in it is being able to experiment in front of you. Someone told me I was brave. Not for the painting I think as much as the words I write. But there is also something that feels intimate in a way to reveal my paintings as well. I paint my heart out in front of  you. Whether you see it or not or read the words or not, that is what I'm doing.

Sometimes when its time to write a post the idea of what to write comes clearly in my head. Other times there are just experiences that force their way into my day and I can't stop thinking about that.

I tend to notice that the stories emulate something from the portrait. Each one is it's own self portrait without looking like me.

Today I'm tired. I stayed up skyping with my daughter. I have to tell you .. I LOVE skyping with my grandchildren and all of my kids. I feel like I get to spend time with them but can't hug them or touch them. But I love seeing them and taking them all in. I sang lullaby's to my grandchildren last night. I watched my daughter cook in the kitchen. We cooked together even though we were six hundred miles apart. I love my daughter. I want desperately for her to be happy and feel joy. I love my daughter. I know that mother daughter relationships can be complicated. I know that I was not a perfect mother and I don't know if I have ever met one. I know that some of my actions as her mother don't feel good to her. But I love my daughter. I can tell you that when she was born she was the third baby I gave birth too. I can also say that I wanted her to be a girl before she was born. I can also tell you that the day that she was born and I found out it was her, I felt like a little girl on christmas morning. I kept waking up and realizing that I had a girl and I would feel a gush of warmth on my heart. I felt instantly in love with her. Did I tell you I love my daughter? Suffice it to say that she is on my mind, i can relate to her right now even though she is far away and doing what I did thirty years ago .. i guess it weighs a little heavy sometimes and that is what you see in the face. So I'm thinking of her, sending her love from my heart and surrounding her and her family with love thoughts and love vibrations and love healing. Maybe if you read this you will send them to her also.

So .. if you would love to have this face on your wall .. email me at iwilldream4ever@aol.com and let me know. I appreciate your comments and your support. It's an amazing experiment so far!!!  And go tell someone you love that you love them. I'll see you tomorrow...