Putting it on canvas.

There some days when stuff happens and you just want to get it out and really not explain or talk about it. Ha .. i know with me that is often not the case. I talk ALOT! lol..

I told a friend that I felt like I had a hangover from emotions. So .. i just decided to paint. I wanted to try adding words that I could find in a large print book I had. After messing around with them for a while I decided on this message, determining that my intuited arrangement was just what it needed to be. The Day My Angels Shook All The Outrageous Silence. It fit for it's own reasons. I enjoy the colors that go with it. It means much to me.

I guess at some point I will decide to go back to the abstracts in number. This is 16 x 20 on stretched canvas. Very colorful. I like looking at it. Thanks for stopping over .. cheers.

I'm still around............

So it's been a while and I have continued to deviate from the abstract paintings. This is a bit abstract.

I enjoyed how this came together and it was after a bit of contemplation and frustration about what's next for me. I am repurposing found art here in the same way that I am attempting to repurpose my life. I make something beautiful or something that is visually satisfying to me from discarded items .. not trash necessarily, but from items that would probably not be put to any good use. Putting myself back together from the shards of what was or what could't be or what I wanted or wished or grieved or cried or wasn't. Going back to reclaim those things I need or never knew or thought I ever had. Seems apropos to write that the title of this piece is called "Finding Her".

It's difficult at times and now I'm even experiencing the physical manifestations of my fears or frustrations surrounding it. Sciatica .. aaaaaaaacccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk. Even the sound of that word sounds sinister and wrong or negative. Perhaps its the seat of all my worries, fears and frustrations. It's a big ball of pain. It can be a relentlessly torturous kind of pain that no position of laying, sitting, standing or walking seems to relieve. I am grateful for the times that can get into a position of no pain. I worry that I will have this as I grow much older and more feeble I'm not sure I could withstand the effort to continue. I feel like I'm in a race against time to be more fit so I won't have this later. I hope I'll be able to keep creating in spite of it. Maybe it will show up as it has in the past .... in my work.

Thanks for stopping over ....as always love to hear your comments even if you may have stopped looking. I haven't been as good lately in posting. I'm still here. Ciao

Stitching and Dyeing

 I have not posted in a while and I have not given up the abstracts I have just needed to do more stitching lately so I thought I'd give you an update on what I've been up too . This on the left is a tunic that I made. Originally this was a mans shirt that I had painted a face and a message to my son with bleach but then I thought the face looked too feminine and he may not wear it so I cut it up and made it into a tunic. I always like to mix things up a bit with other fabrics that I have altered with discharge or rust or eco-dyeing. I had stitched the entire garment except for one small area on one side because I wanted to wear it and ran out of time yesterday.

I have also included some of my rusted fabrics. I love doing them and I never know how the rusted water's will be absorbed into the fabrics. I love to alter fabrics so much that I don't limit my self to a particular type of fabric. I have so much fabric from my mom's sewing room that I wouldn't normally use. Somehow rusting it makes it way more appealing to use in my art and sewing.

I continue to have to work on getting out of my own way in this process of getting my work out there. I will keep plugging away at it and hope that sooner rather than later, I will figure things out.

Thanks for stopping over to see my work.!!! Love hearing your thoughts on my work ..

To the left is rusted light blue denim.. i love the design that was created here. Below is another one. Or it could be the back ....haha .. i can't remember.

 The gray fabrics below are soy mordanted cottons that were dyed with Australian Pine leaves. The last one is dyed in pomegranate that was only dyed in sun heated rain water and not cooked. I have it in a ceramic pot with a lid and it has fermented but still gives me a fairly light fast gray. I have dyed some fabrics in the same pot with no mordant and those started out gray and then I have laid it in the sun and it turned a wonderful golden brown. I will try to post more photo's of that. Thanks again for stopping over.!!

No. 32 Light Ascending

Wow I can hardly believe that it's been so long since I've posted. It sure hasn't meant that I haven't been painting because I am either painting, stitching, outside dyeing fabric or playing in rust buckets. Never a shortage of things to CREATE!!! Today this painting was just crying out from me somewhere and had to come out. There is always something about the connections of fields of color with these dots of light.. or just white. I find my self drawn to it. This incorporates my love of rust. There are seven different pieces of rusted fabric here and it harkens my love of stitching as well .. those white strokes... and it's about intimate connection. It makes me want to do more and more and more like this.. larger. Oh and see that lovely gray there .. that's natural dye stuff. I'm loving that gray. Going to do more of that too.. !!!

I'll just post an image of what I've been painting. I did a fun piece for a gallery that is doing a spring theme show. I called it Mother Earth in The Garden of My Heart. Red haired wild girl..

It was fun to paint the flowers and hair .. and to put a bluebird in the hair. There's even a dragonfly in it. So yeah .. maybe i'm all over the place .. but i'm having fun.

Let me know at iwilldream4ever@aol.com if you are interested in either of these paintings.

Thanks as always for your comments .. they mean a lot to me.

Abstract No. 31 A Little Light Goes a Long Way In The Shadows of my Heart

It's been over a week since I have last posted here and shown my work. I have been painting every day or nearly every day except the weekend of my birthday and this week following. I had several days of celebration which has been nearly unheard of in the past several years. Generally it's been just a day to get through. This year though it was a bit more fun and kept me busier then usual. When you stay home all the time there is a side effect to going out a lot. I don't want to leave again and I need time to recharge. There were several days since that I chose to stitch instead of paint and that has left me feeling a bit out of the grove so to speak. That along with personal angst leaves me flooded with a staleness that makes productivity less fluid. I want to do all the things that I do at the same time which is NOT possible so I feel torn, i'd rather feel joy. I'd rather not judge myself for loving to make many different kinds of art.

About this piece .. i painted so many strokes on this one and then thought it looked too contrived that I just painted over it. I only hesitated for a minute cause I did put hours of strokes. Was it wasted if I eventually got to this?  I painted over and over some more. This is where it ended up. There is a constant battle in my self to remake my mind and heart to love and joy and light when I at times battle hard emotions. So I paint over my heart till I find some stillness and peace. This feels like light moving over the chasm of darkness that is somewhere in the back ground of my life let alone this painting. The parts that I love the most are the tiny dots of white that start at the beginning of the golden dots of light connecting the fields of light. And the ones in the center of those same places. They seem to pop out .. they are important. A little light goes a long way in the shadows of my heart. I breath in deep and sigh releasing the harder things and being left with little dots of light. Little dots of light..... and I sigh again...

I hope to post more as I return to the groove .. painting every day is a great value. Experiments with light and color have been very much fun.

If you are interested in this painting please contact me at iwilldream4ever@aol.com.. is is about 12-14" x 16-18" I'll check for sure if you'd like to have it on your wall.

No. 30 _ It's about Love

I have called this "It's about Love" because I want to spend my time focusing on the things that I want in my life and how I want to feel about the world around me and the people in my life. I want to always hold love in my heart and I am thinking that this will be a better focus then all the other stuff that creeps into my head at times. So I painted this because I love still, painting faces and it overlaps something that was a more graphic painting so the whole image has a graphic feel to it. I wrote the message in the inner circle like in the recesses of my own heart and mind. In my Heart of hearts .. this is where I want to be. So just for now .. that's where I am .. it's about Love .. so I wish that for you who come here and for all that may pass my way.. to know love, to feel love, to be love, to have love, to be saturated with love forever and always. Always Love!!!

Have a love filled day and thanks for stopping over and for visiting. Not sure I'm done totally with this one just yet .. but I'll let you know. Ciao...

No. 29 Abstract _ Releasing Joy

Today is Abstract 29 and I decided to title this one Releasing Joy because I decided to just have a blast and release my inner child to just have fun and put it out there. That's just what I did. I'm going to do a bunch more that is like this I think .. it's just fun.

When I'm not at home painting for my blog, lately I've been going down to the gallery that I've been selling some of my work and painting along with some other artists that are there. I have had a blast doing this and then interacting with people that happen to come into the gallery. It's something I think I've needed. I'm doing a kind of abstract face on a large surface. I'm enjoying the evolution of that work. It's always funny to see the public's response to my work. Sometimes it makes me laugh. But i'm enjoying the whole thing. So I'm in gratitude. Happy to be painting every day!!!

This is a smaller painting about 10" x 10" and on primed canvas but not stretched. Please contact me if you are interested in this painting. Have a wonderful JOY filled day.. i'm planning too. Thanks for stopping over. :)